Post-Holidays, I’ve had some musings on Love. Let me start with what some might think is a bold assertion: our natural state of being is Love. When our material needs are met, we are safe, and surrounded by people who love or care for us, I believe Love is our base setting. Think about it. When those things are in place, what do we feel? We feel Love. Don’t we?
We usually call this place home, wherever or with whomever that is. It’s such an unbidden truth, we use that saying, “Home is Where The Heart Is”. The word home conjures up what emotions? Peace. Safety. And yes, Love. When those pesky necessities of life are met and we feel safe and cared for, Love just naturally bubbles up. We’re home, if you will.
This brings up another point. It’s so natural, it happens on its own! We “fall” in Love. No effort there. Babies are born and they love. They don’t know much else, but they know how to Love. And we Love them right back. From the moment they arrive. For no reason at all and for every reason under the Sun! We can’t help ourselves. Love flows naturally and easily when we’re with our pets too. Something this easy has to be our natural state of being now, doesn’t it?
We also know the truth that Love is our natural state through our own lives. Our experience tells us. Let me ask you something: What is the best feeling of all? I’ll give you a second. It’s Love, isn’t it? Isn’t that the emotion we most want in life? This is our deepest, purest, most cherished emotion. It’s Love. We crave it and lament when it has left our lives. Love is what we live and die for. You don’t even have to take my word for it: countless books, movies and songs have been written about Love! At least the romantic kind. But, Love as our deepest, most sought after emotion, shows up everywhere. With our children, a close friend, our pets, or in Nature itself. In all of these cases, Love shows up again and again. There is no other emotion we’d take over Love in all of our non-romantic relationships either.
One last point for the truly hard to convince: isn’t it feeling Love that makes us feel whole? Doesn’t that alone speak to the awesome and all-encompassing power of love? You wouldn’t say any other emotion “completes” you, now would you? Not anger certainly. But, happiness wouldn’t do it either. Not envy, jealousy, nor comfort nor amusement would get it done. It’s OK, you can admit it. You need love to feel complete. But, we’ve known that truth at least since Jerry Maguire came out, haven’t we?
Since I’m a good sport, I’ll even lower the bar. Maybe it’s too much to ask other emotions if they complete us. That is a tall order, after all. OK, how about this. Is there any emotion you’d prefer over love? I can’t think of any. Joy? Hope? Gratitude? All good stuff. But, if you had to pick only one emotion that you could feel for the rest of your life, I bet you’d choose love.
There you have it. When all the depravations and distractions of life are torn away, we feel Love. It’s our natural state. Our default setting, if you prefer. Then, if it’s true that love is our natural state — which I believe it is — then let me raise another question. Shouldn’t our guiding question to inform our lives be: how do I get back to love (or remain there)? No, not in a clingy, suffering-inducing grasping kind of way. I mean shouldn’t we be orienting our lives to simply allow our natural state, Love to arrive. Shouldn’t this inform everything we do? How do we get to feeling Love and how does everyone else get there too? (Love never runs out either! Unlike many things, it actually grows when you share it! How cool is that?)
Imagine a world where we oriented our lives, our society, and (dare I say) our economy, to bring Love to as many people as we can. Stop and give it a quick daydream. Wow, right?
Lots of wise and great minds have arrived at this same place, albeit from different paths or angles. Jesus taught us about the primacy of Love in our lives. Every religion I know of speaks to the importance of Love too. But, it’s not just in religion. All the great ones spoke to the awe and supremacy of Love: Martin Luther King, Jr., Mother Theresa, Bob Marley, Gandhi, Sojourner Truth, George Bailey, the old Greek guys.
I know some people hear this and believe that putting Love front and center will somehow neuter them or make them weak. That Love will reduce them to a life on a Zen Master’s mat or as a motionless blob of Jello. Hogwash. Love doesn’t stop you from protecting yourself or seeking what you need or want in life. For example, you can go buy a cup of coffee with, or without, Love. That’s true of every one of life’s activities. But, which would you choose? We already know, don’t we? With Love is better than without!
This is also true of all the issues that go on in our world, both BIG and small. Accepting Love as our natural state and aligning our lives toward that truth, doesn’t stop you from using your voice or standing up for issues that you care about. There is no dichotomy here. You can act. You can love. Most importantly, you can act with love. Love doesn’t mean descending into squalor or disengagement from the world.
But, it will change how you engage. It’s a change you need though. If you want to put Love at the forefront of your life, that is. Let me explain. By remaining in accord with Love while you act, you can get back to or remain with Love.
This truth feels urgently needed by many. If what we are doing is out of alignment with Love, we are actually abandoning our natural state. Going against our nature is abandoning ourselves. That’s the harm. Given the prevalence of anger, hate, and division consuming millions and roiling through many nations across the world, let us remember this. You won’t change or “beat” anyone else’s anger or hate with your own. (Since emotions feed off of each other, you’ll only fuel it!) Only Love can conquer all. (Cliche intended.) So, find your way to Act. With Love. Stand up. With Love. Engage. With love. We could start with Love Thy Neighbor, couldn’t we? See, we’ve been told how important Love is for a very long time. That one shouldn’t be too hard to figure out?